NET CRAZY

You know you surf Internet for 8-9 hrs per day on your laptop at home when:

1. You are talking to people with your hand on the table and fingers virtual-typing the words you are speaking and you feel bad that you can’t catch up with your speed


2. When sitting in office you graze your thumb slightly over the space on the platform near the keyboard hoping that the pointer on screen would move.


3. You move the pointer on the right side of the screen hoping that in some time dock-bar of Google Desktop will move out giving you the latest news and newest articles on your most favourite RSS enabled websites.


4. While typing e-mail, you suddenly think of a phrase that could accurately describe the point. However, you curse silently when you realise you don’t have Internet there in the company to verify the same (and do further follow-ups such as etymology and other similar words) on Google or Wikipedia.


5. On a fateful day when there is no internet and friends come inquiring if you are ok since net is not available, you ask

“Hey you got your cell phone right now?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Which service provider do you have?”
“&^%&^%* one, it is cheap and…”
“And does this offer include a GPRS connection as well!”


6. You iron your clothes for going to office the next day; you keep checking your laptop for Internet connection but of no avail. So to your mind back to “normality” you keep ironing the clothes with a pint of neat Vodka beside you.


7. When a volunteer turns up at your door asking for donation to aid young women of UK and claims that their organisation has done a lot of pioneering work in this area, you are tempted to ask, “ Do you have a website where I can see your claims and verify it and get back to you??”


8. When you overhear a colleague talking on phone ".....its like the kiss of apocalypse ". You wonder what does he mean by that and open Outlook go to Draft, open a saved mail and add this topic to your list reminding yourself to mail the list at EOD and search all the terms in the list @ Google and/or wikipedia. If you couldn't get the phrase anywhere you ask this fellow the meaning of that. OR alternatively you have been given new mouse-mats and on the back of it are claims of ultra-precise-tracking. You wonder if that's related to the UK/European patent no. mentioned below, you add these nos. to your list as well.


9. The meanings of FORWARDS stops holding any meaning/significance for you since all FORWARDS related to current affairs or otherwise have already been read by you. So when someone sends you a forward about "being careful of DELL laptops since one exploded and he is about to tell you the context, you say, "Yeah!, I know ..during a Japanese conference"


10. When you type e-mail in a typical blog fashion quoting people's comments/views in italics and giving hyperlinks to whichever folder you mention.


11. When you realize that you are really a crazy maniac and a freak for internet and you think of quitting this habit. You tell your friends at a party that you want to quit and they say, “Well yes you should. However, you should first go and write a blog about that. Ha ha.. hee hee.. hoo hoo.(group laughter sounds)”


12. As you are typing this article at Office for posting a blog at home, you are wondering if there is anything more to write about and wondering what will you do as you’ve finished typing “……wondering what will you do as you’ve finished typing.”